She asks what I want to work on that day with a laugh. That's what I love about this group- the courses are always tricky and the exercises technical. But for me? I get to pick what I want to work on- and news flash- it's crossrails. Again. So we start weaving a pattern together and no joke, if this were the Hunter Derby of Crossrails, Ellie and I would have won. Every distance came up beautifully, Ellie was balance and happy, we were clicking in a way we hadn't before.
Could I be satisfied with that? Some days- yes! But today there was a pink flowered vertical set against the rail that called my name like a sirens song. We trotted it a few times before I asked Emma to raise the rail to 2'3". This is my game- I love the long ride to a single fence. We got this!
Actually. No. No we did not. Or should I say, I did not have game that day. In blurry video 1. we see Ellie and I riding a great pace towards the fence. 4 strides out I didn't see anything and rather than sit like a patient rider and wait......I kicked her forward shouting something like "LET'S GO FIND IT." In my head.
In video 2. we actually did wait and I would take the chip any day. Ells came to us having been rushed to fences a bit- and while she is game for the long distance- the trainers would like to see her sit back a bit. Hence the - DO NOT CHASE IT IS A MORTAL SIN.
Video 2.5- wait- there isn't a 2.5. That's because I chased her down to a long distance that had her drop a rail (hang head in shame).
So a well deserved video 3- where she shakes her hoof at me and lets me know she's had enough! Actually I think I worried her to the point where she no longer wanted to jump the fence. After her run out we trotted it one last time and called it a day.
Why is it still bugging me? It's amazing how quickly ones confidence can rise only to be shattered- I KNOW I will be thinking about that fence going into our Thursday lesson. Also- I really really don't want to ruin my young horse. I know this single sequence isn't going to cause major ongoing issues- but it's the lack of body control that worries me. In my mind I'm saying- "wait for it dummy!" But my body is reacting out of fear.
I think the best action I can take right now is to stay in my comfort zone. Build our confidence together over crossrails and 18" fences. When I get the urge to jump up- I need to jump another crossrail course perfectly. Three times in a row.
And know that I won't be perfect. Ellie won't be perfect. And we both need to develop a sense of humor about the whole thing. Because we? Are going to be awesome.
Hang in there, things will come together. While yes you did rush there isn't anything to be ashamed of there we all do it sometimes. Maybe if larger fences make you nervous only doing the big ones at the end of a gymnastic for a while would help you relax into the right feel?
ReplyDeleteAgree- I think working them into a gymnastic might do the trick!
DeleteEveryone has those bad rides. :) Every time I do, I just go for a simple hack. Walk around the property on the buckle and relax. It seems to put things in perspective and calm everyone down. :) You'll get there!!
ReplyDeleteGreat call- we did just that on Sunday- a nice trail instead of a lesson!
DeleteMoving up is tough; but you'll get there!
ReplyDeleteWe are our worst critics! Just remember that horses forgive and that's what makes them so great! You two are coming together so quickly, and really, we all have crappy rides sometimes.
ReplyDeleteWe sure are our worst critics!
DeleteHonestly I liked your ride in the 1st video! Don't be so hard on yourself, it's okay :)
ReplyDeleteI know! I'm my own worst enemy!
DeleteIt's kind of funny/sad how hard we are on ourselves. I thought your first ride looked really good and believe me we all still battle these body control issues as we move up. You'll get it, I have no doubt!
ReplyDelete